Introduction:
Jesus says, “If you love Me, you will obey my commandments.”
In that one verse we find the seed of how we should all live, and teach our children to live in love. Our Christian life and witness hinges on love, and therefore, obedience. That does not mean that we earn God’s love through obedience. It also does not mean that we should allow the enemy to convince us that our Christian walk is one of drudgery or duty.
It is our privilege to obey. We love because He first loved us, remember. His love was poured out on the cross. He laid aside everything so that He might carry the sins of the whole world. That was not His duty. He was within His rights to simply abandon or annihilate all of creation. He chose, instead, to pitch His tent among us, live a sinless life, and die a sinners death. That, my friend, is love.
Our obedience affords us some additional privileges.
- We walk in unhindered fellowship with God.
- We experience an assurance that is unthreatened by the enemy.
- We have an unhindered joy that provides supernatural strength in the face of challenges.
- Peace, glorious peace, guards our hearts and minds through prayer.
- So much more…
Disobedience to God, on the other hand, promises broken fellowship with God, doubts and fears, lack of joy and peace, chaos, broken relationships…it is an ugly picture we see played out every day, unfortunately.
Study One: Children, obey your parents.
READ:
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—this is the first commandment with a promise: 3 “so that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
4 And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. – Ephesians 6:1-4 (NRSV)
DECIDE:
We all have a tendency to make things really complicated. The passage of scripture that we have been focusing on over the past few weeks is not complicated at all, really. It is ultimately about love. Paul has been instructing the Ephesian church, and us, concerning our need to live out the love of God that dwells within us. That means we put out the sinful habits of our past life and adopt the lifestyle God intends.
It is no accident that Paul turns first to how that works out in the Christian home. That is why he calls for children to obey their parents “in the Lord.” Just as we want to love our Savior by keeping his commandments, we are instructed as children to love our parents through obedience. This follows the simple command to honor our father and mother. That is God’s plan. Our children must be taught that from an early age.
DECLARE:
Obedience to parents continues the theme of submission that runs through this entire passage. Our parents are God’s first conduit of authority into our lives. Conscience rebellion against them is rebellion against God. God’s declaration that we are to honor our father and mother comes with the promise of a well-lived life that is characterized by longevity. This is no surprise to those who pay any attention to the scientific research on stress and relationships. There are few things more damaging to our heart and brain than the stress hormone cortisol. I do not believe it to be an over-reach to conclude that a right and healthy relationship with our parents is a positive step in the area of our health. What do you think? God knows what we need. He knows what is best for us in terms of our relationships. We can declare with some confidence that when we live God’s way, it is a healthy influence.
DEVOTE:
Why is it important to God that we honor our father and mother?
When we consider the Ten Commandments as a foundation of right relationships…the family is of primary importance. How can we live that out, today, practically?
PRAY:
Father, Your plan is better. Our best laid plans often lead to pain and chaos. Help us to learn that loving You through obedience is always right and for our good. As children, help us to resist the temptation to dishonor our father and mother in speech and in actions. Mold us and shape us with the mind of Christ, whose first priority was to do the will of His Father. In Jesus name, Amen.
Study Two: Father Time
READ: Reread Ephesians 6:1-4
DECIDE:
Ok, Dad (or other head of household), it’s time to decide. It’s time to make a determination of what those 5 most important things you can do for your children are. Each of our lists may be a little different. One common denominator for everything on those lists, however, is TIME. When we consider the thing that will most exasperate, offend, or otherwise provoke our our children to anger, it is neglect. The multitude of choices made that remove us from the quality time that we should spend with our children offends the priority of this passage.
Think about it, this way. How are we to bring up, admonish, and edify our children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord unless we take the time? It is not going to happen. If you are committing yourself to taking the time to read and pray with your family, that is a good step in the right direction.
DECLARE:
Life is exhausting…and let’s face the facts that, more often than not, others are getting the best of us and our families are getting the leftovers. It pains me to write that because it has been true for most of my life and “ministry.” So, let’s think of some ways that we can declare to our families, our spouses, our children that they are loved as God intends. I’ll start with a list of five declarations to give us a starting point:
- I’ll take the time to sit down for a meal and make an effort to engage in meaningful conversation with my family.
- I’ll read the Bible with my family.
- I’ll pray with my family
- I’ll take time for some 1-to-1 conversation with my kids
- I’ll include my kids in my daily activities, whether that be working around the house, preparing a meal, playing a game, etc.
What is that one thing that you can share on a consistent basis, each day? Start and build from there. The key is being intentional. The older your children, the more difficult it will be to establish new habits.
DEVOTE:
Ask your kids: “What is one thing we can do together, that YOU enjoy, this week?”
PRAY:
Heavenly Father, the demands of life often consume our time. Guide my heart and mind into the priorities that matter most to my family, my health, and my personal growth in You. I depend on You to continue to form that love in me that will shed light on my way and make my path straight. Help me to love as You love and I know everything will be right. In Jesus name, amen.