Introduction:
“I did it my way!”
I can hear Elvis belting those words, now. His cover of the Frank Sinatra classic has probably far surpassed the original in popularity. The song is a sweeping statement of the philosophy of self-satisfaction and self-reliance above all else. It comes to a crescendo with the last verse:
“For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself then he has naught
Not to say the things that he truly feels
And not the words of someone who kneels
The record shows I took all the blows and did it my way.”
In today’s world, one need not look very far to see this philosophy lived without apology. At the extreme, abortion exists because we have adopted such a way to live. Even more insidious, however, is the broken relationships that result from insisting on having my own way no matter the cost.
This is not the way of Jesus. In fact, the standard of Jesus in human relationships is submission. This week, that is our focus.
Study One: Submission, generally speaking…
READ:
21 Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ.
– Ephesians 5:21 (NRSV)
DECIDE:
Christian discipleship is centered in relationships. Our FIRST RELATIONSHIP, that being our relationship to God, is to love Him with every ounce of who we are, with every fiber of our being, with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. If that is true of us…if we love Him, we will keep His commandments. As a demonstration of our love for God, we submit to Him. Our SECOND RELATIONSHIP, that being our relationship to others, is to love our neighbor as ourselves. As disciples of Jesus, our love for one another is the identifying witness to the world that we are His. As disciples of Jesus, we are to submit ourselves to one another our of reverence to Jesus. The love of God perfected within us will flow out in our relations with others. Paul, here, says the standard is to submit.
Romans 12:10 says: “love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honor.” This is not a picture of making oneself a doormat to be trodden on by those who desire power. This is a picture of sisters and brothers giving preference to one another and subordinating their own interests for the good of others. Simply stated: God first, others second.
DECLARE:
The lifestyle Paul is describing here is sometimes uncomfortable, sometimes downright risky, but always reaping the greatest reward. If we are to have the mind of Christ and follow in the way of the Cross, we must begin practicing mutual submission as a discipline.
This is a matter of faith. The fact is, a lack of love is a pretty good indicator that we are not where God intends spiritually. John makes this declaration: “Those who say, ‘I love God,’ and hate their brothers or sisters, are liars; for those who do not love a brother or sister whom they have seen, cannot love God whom they have not seen.” Beyond that, many shun the idea of submission out of fear of being mistreated in some way, demonstrating a lack of trust in God. Without doubt, there have been those who have used this teaching about submission as a power-grab and a grand manipulation of others. With God’s help, we can discern such a situation and avoid being entrapped.
DEVOTE:
Mutual submission flies in the face of personal freedom, at times. A good example of this is found in 1 Corinthians 8:12-13 on the subject of eating meat. Read that, together, and think of other situations that might require we choose to stop or delay doing something we want for the benefit of another.
PRAY:
Lord, God, it’s difficult to elevate others and humble ourselves. It’s difficult to put my wants aside for the benefit of someone else. Help us to learn what it means to be imitators of God as beloved children, living in love as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us. (Ephesians 5:1) Amen.
Study Two: Submission, specifically
READ:
22 Wives, be subject to your husbands as you are to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the church, the body of which he is the Savior. 24 Just as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives ought to be, in everything, to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 in order to make her holy by cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, 27 so as to present the church to himself in splendor, without a spot or wrinkle or anything of the kind—yes, so that she may be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. -Ephesians 5:22-28 (NRSV)
DECIDE:
In our previous study, we attempted to grasp mutual submission out of reverence to Christ. Mutual submission, we determined, is a love and faith issue. Our love of God, demonstrated by our obedience to His commands, aligns our faith, freeing us to live God’s way for God’s glory. Specifically applied to the wife-husband relationship, mutual submission if a glorious picture of Jesus and the Church. From top to bottom, inside and out, this is a portrait of Jesus and His followers.
I love Jesus, therefore, I will obey Him. This is not about duty. This is not about some existential threat of eternal damnation. This is all about Christ in me.
I reverence Christ, therefore, I will subject myself to my sister/brother in Christ. I’ll look to their interest and good ahead of my own. I’ll consider their preferences, their convictions, and their edification ahead of my personal desires.
Specific to the wife-husband relationship, submission is fully illustrated as a love-faith issue. Women/Wives are co-equal heirs with men/husbands in relation to God in Jesus Christ. The surrounding culture of the time demeaned and denigrated women. In Christ, they were delivered from such a curse and given equal standing. They were released from duty and were called to walk in love, like the Church was called to walk in reverence of Jesus. Men/Husbands were called to abandon practice of lording over their wives, mistreating them in the name of culture. Instead, Christ is once again lifted up as the example. Husbands are called to love as Christ loved the Church and give himself up for her.
DECLARE:
Let’s move beyond simple declarations of love for Jesus and our spouse. I lived in Missouri for nearly twelve years. It is known as the Show-Me State. The roots of this nickname date back to 1899. Representative Willard Vandiver delivered a speech in which he said:
“I come from a state that raises corn and cotton and cockleburs and Democrats, and frothy eloquence neither convinces nor satisfies me. I am from Missouri. You have got to show me.”
Frothy eloquence has little to no substance, because it is not followed by actions. We must dare to be different. This is especially true in our homes, wives and husbands. Is it too much to say that we are sisters and brothers in Jesus before we are spouses according to the law? I do not think so. Let’s declare and determine that we are going to demonstrate that very fact, minute by minute, as a testimony of our love for God and one another.
DEVOTE:
Read back through the scripture and note the number of times the rights and role of Jesus are used to inform the relationship between wives and husbands. There are few things more sacred than the relationship described here. Now, consider how society continues to cheapen and undermine this relationship.
PRAY:
God, help us reclaim the territory the enemy has taken in our families. May we be a shining light to our friends and family. Through our mutual submission, may we demonstrate the righteousness of Christ in us. May we demonstrate the love of Jesus that fills our hearts. May we reverence Christ in all things, especially our family. Amen.